Being in Iraq for the holidays is always hard. Adding to the feelings of being alone is knowing that we here left all of our families and friends behind. Although we are here to a noble purpose, a calling many would not choose to answer, we do miss some of the things we have left behind.
As another nightly BBQ was taking place, I had completed all of my work for the day, I decided to do something I hadn’t had time for since arriving to Iraq. I dug in my pockets looking for a notebook with my calling card information so that I could call back to the States. When trying to decide who to call, only one name came to mind, one person who I missed talking to: my mother.
As she answered the phone, not knowing who was calling, I held back tears of happiness. It had been 56 days since I last spoke to her since leaving with four days notice for my deployment. Once I told her I was calling, she let out a loud scream of joy. Even with the few seconds of delay, the hour I spent talking with her was well-needed. Before getting off the phone, she continued to encourage me, tell me how proud she was of what I had volunteered for and what I had accomplished. The main thing she said was to continue praying. As we got off the phone, I headed to my room for the evening.
My mother is a strong woman. With three boys, she did everything she possibly could to make sure we were taken care of, to make sure we were protected. As times got hard and we moved around several times in the recent years, she continued to have faith that things would get better. She continued to push me so that I would be able to live a better life. When it came to choosing between her getting something she had saved for and getting something for her children, she would always choose her sons over herself.
When she first learned of my volunteering to come to Iraq with less than a week to prepare, she was furious. She was a mother who was going to lose contact with her youngest son. She would not be able to see me grow as she had in my earlier years. Those feelings of anger and outrage quickly turned to pride. For seven long years, she knew my dream was to come here and serve. She knew since I enlisted in the military I had been waiting to do my part. Now that the chance had been given to me, she was going to support me all the way.
They say it takes a village to raise a child. Personally, my mother was more than any village could provide; she was my world. Even though we had been separated since 2005 due to my military aspirations, we would talk constantly through email and on the phone. Very seldom did more than a day go by without us talking. She instilled the value of honor in me, one of the ways I choose to live my life. When I felt as if I had made a bad decision or needed advice, she was always there to comfort me, staying on the phone to talk to me as long as I needed.
Since being in the military, two significant events happened in my life that landed me in the hospital, one almost claiming my life. Each time, she had made a 1,300 mile trip in less than a day to be by my side. Staying until I felt I was well enough for her to leave, she would stand over me, sit next to me, talk to me, and pray for me. Whether she knows it or not, she has made a tremendous difference in my life. I am now able to brave dangers as I work in a country where violence is rampant. I know that wherever I go, whatever I’m doing, she is going to be somewhere thinking about me, waiting for me to come back safely.
A wonderful woman she is indeed. 57 days seemed like an eternity without being able to hear her voice. This holiday season in Iraq, I couldn’t ask for anything more. As long I was able to hear her voice, to laugh and joke on the phone as we had done so many times before, my holidays were complete. As many of the troops here wait for gifts and cards, I only await another night where I am free of work, so I can once again hear the voice of the one woman who means the world to me. I wait for the chance to enjoy one more phone call during the dark hours of the night so my mother can once again brighten up my day.
** Dedicated to S. Finley **
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